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I Wish I Still Cared

annette holguin

Heavenly Mary 

that I've known forever, 

I wish I still cared. 

 

I wish I still cared, for  

           the saintly stories and buildings, all  

                        the paint-withered statues and things. 

I wish I still cared for 

           The church Sundays and confessions, all 

                        of which doesn’t make a difference to privileged sinners. 

I wish I still cared, for 

           your son’s sacrificed blood, all  

                        he did was save so, so many that even he would abhor. 

I wish I still cared, for  

           my mother’s prayers to whomever will hear, all 

                        in hopes to “save” my soul. Surely you’ve listened, haven’t you?  

I wish I still cared, for 

            earning a seat for myself in heaven above, all 

                        I truly beg for is a reason to survive this manmade Hell. 

I wish I still cared for 

             fearing angel Lucifer’s oh so sinful designs, all 

                        I see nearly daily are human crimes committed in the name of God. 

 

Heavenly Mary, 

I wish I still cared, but I've long given up 

Ever since I saw 

 

Through 

             your 

                       Veil. 

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Author Bio

Annette Holguin is a current Senior double majoring in Creative Writing and Linguistics with a minor in Secondary Education at The University of Texas at El Paso. Her work was previously published in Chrysalis and Pasos Journal during her time as an EPCC student, and as a UTEP student she was a contributor to Issue 2 of el underground. She is an El Paso native and uses her experiences as a Mexican American to further practice and strengthen her writing and storytelling. 

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